Enlightened (Untwisted Series Book 4) Read online

  ‘Don’t you trust me?’

  This time Nathan’s exhalation wasn’t smooth or controlled. Instead he huffed out a breath, puffing his cheeks as he did so, and lowering his brows into a frown that matched my own. ‘I trust you, Stella. I just don’t trust all the pricks who will be trying it on with you all fucking night.’ His growing agitation was clear, but I wasn’t really sure how to deal with it because what he was saying was just ridiculous.

  ‘You’re not my keeper, Nathan. As it is I hardly ever go out without you. Besides, even if every man in the club tried it on with me they wouldn’t have any luck because it’s you that I’m committed to,’ I told him simply, meaning every single word. He might have his oddities, but Nathan was it for me. No man had ever made me feel the way he did, and the fact they we were a perfect match in the bedroom too just added to our amazing compatibility. I couldn’t believe he would doubt me like this.

  I watched as Nathan remained in his dark place, his frown deepening as his mind obviously dwelled on unrealistic images, no doubt containing me surrounded by packs of rabid men with their hands all over my body. ‘If you were my sub I’d simply tell you not to go,’ he muttered petulantly, but his words shocked me into almost dropping my drink.

  A horrible chill descended upon me, instantly cooling the hot flush that I’d been experiencing earlier. ‘Is that what you want?’ I asked in a ghost of a whisper, ‘To order me around? To go back to how your life used to be?’ My trembling hand managed to place my drink down before gripping the table to steady myself. He’d made such progress lately, surely he couldn’t want it to go back to the days of non-emotional sexual encounters where I was simply his sub and nothing more?

  Blinking several times Nathan seemed to wake from whatever trance he was in, cocked his head, and studied me intently before shocking me completely by breaking out into a wide smile that complete lit up his lovely face. ‘What? No, of course not.’ His smile turned into a full, mega-watt Nathan grin, one that not many people beyond me ever got to see, ‘It would just make dealing you and your stubborn, difficult ways easier sometimes, that’s all.’ He smirked as he took another sip of his beer and placed the empty bottle on the table.

  He was kidding with me – or at least I thought he was – but the sudden change in his demeanour was still concerning me. ‘Wanting to go to my friend’s hen do makes me difficult and stubborn?’ I asked with a disbelieving laugh, hoping that my earlier concerns had just been misplaced.

  Raising his eyebrows he shook his head, but I could tell from the twinkle in his eye that Nathan was definitely teasing me, which made my shoulders relax. ‘No, but wanting to go to your friend’s hen do in a club full of randy arseholes and no doubt dance and shake your body in front of them? That makes you difficult and stubborn to deal with,’ he concluded with a firm nod.

  Rolling my eyes at him I shook my head and couldn’t help but giggle. As I sipped on my cocktail I watched as Nathan chewed on the inside of his lower lip and even though he was playing around with me I suspected that my night out with the girls really was causing him concern, which on the one hand was rather sweet, but on the other side was also way too possessive and probably needed to be addressed.

  On the table Nathan’s phone chimed with an incoming message which broke me from my pondering and halted any thoughts I’d been having about continuing the conversation. Glancing at his phone he pocketed it and then spoke, ‘Drink up, our car has arrived.’ My forehead creased at his words. Car? We’d come by train, so I looked up at him in confusion hoping for an explanation.

  Shrugging, he gazed at me intently, his big blues immediately sucking me into his spell. ‘You said you were tired, so I sent a quick text and requested a company car pick us up,’ Nathan explained, lifting his chin in the direction of the curb outside the bar where a very long, sleek black Mercedes was idling on some double yellow lines. After my initial shock died away I grinned at Nathan and once he had dumped some cash on the table I allowed him to help me to my feet.

  Perhaps I’m a touch cynical, but part of me suspected that this incredibly sweet gesture by Nathan was actually his cunning way of avoiding public transport, but for once I decided not to question his actions – after all, I was feeling tired and this certainly beat the walk back to the crowded station. Not to mention the masses of steps back down to the platform …

  With his hand possessively on the base of my spine Nathan led me from the bar and across the pavement to the waiting car. As soon as we approached it an impeccably dressed driver, complete with peaked cap, got out and nodded his greeting to Nathan. ‘Good afternoon, Mr Jackson.’

  Replying with a swift, ‘Hello, Ryan,’ and a handshake, Nathan allowed him to open the back door for me with a polite smile and a dip of his head. Sliding into the cool interior of the car I looked around in appreciation. This had to be the fanciest car I’d ever been in. It was complete with two sets of seats facing each other and a small side table that surely must have contained a mini bar. Wow. Breathing in I got a nose full of the luxurious smell of leather from the seats mixed with a faint hint of Nathan’s lovely aftershave and quickly decided that as a treat I rather liked this car.

  ‘How come I’ve never been in one of your company cars before?’ I murmured, turning to Nathan as he slid in beside me, somehow appearing graceful in even the simplest of movements. The corners of his mouth twitched into a near-smile as he shrugged, ‘This isn’t any old company car.’ Nathan said smugly, flicking me with a smirk. ‘It’s a Mercedes Pullman limousine,’ he informed me, not that that really meant a great deal to me. ‘It’s only used for special events, but it was the only car available today. And as for why you’ve never been in here before?’ he shrugged, ‘You don’t seem interested when I try and flaunt my wealth so I gave up trying to impress you with money a long time ago.’ Oh. Well that was true – Nathan’s money was a nice extra I suppose, but his cash certainly wasn’t the reason I was with him. ‘Plus you seem to have some bloody obsession with public transport,’ he muttered with a baffled shake of his head looking genuinely mystified.

  ‘After that lunch I doubt we’ll need a proper dinner tonight, but we’ll stop off and grab some snacks just in case we get hungry again.’ Leaning forward he spoke to the driver, ‘Home please, Ryan, but could you stop off on the way at River Deli and get us two of their sandwich tasting plates? I have some calls to make, so no interruptions please,’ Nathan said, leaning back and pressing a button that raised the privacy glass and effectively closed us in our own little bubble.

  Leaning forwards I touched his arm gingerly, well aware that I was about to bring up one of his sore points again. ‘Actually, Nathan, can we stop in at my place on the way too? I need to grab some clothes for work tomorrow,’ I murmured softly, before sitting back and bracing myself for the anticipated rant.

  Watching his body tense Nathan’s expression darkened as he narrowed his eyes and made a growling noise in the back of his throat, ‘If you lived with me you wouldn’t need to keep bringing a bloody overnight bag with you,’ he mumbled petulantly, before taking several deep breaths and muttering a countdown from five to zero under his breath. Staying silent I patiently let him do his counting thing. This was a foible of his that I was well used to now. Initially when I’d caught him counting under his breath I’d thought it was my imagination, but when we had started to spend more time together I had noticed the habit a lot more frequently. A few months ago I’d finally plucked up the courage to ask him about it, and Nathan had begrudgingly informed me that he used the countdowns in combination with deep breaths to calm himself when he was feeling particularly highly strung, stressed, or angry.

  My forehead creased as an unpleasant thought suddenly came to my mind. ‘Did you do your countdowns before you met me?’ My voice sounded small in the quiet interior of the car, but truthfully I was a little concerned what answer I might get. Given how frequently he did them whilst I was around I couldn’t help but think that perhaps my presence in h
is life had disrupted his usual order.

  ‘Yes, why?’ he asked cautiously, turning to me.

  Chewing on my lower lip I shrugged slightly, suddenly feeling self-conscious. ‘I was just wondering if I stress you out,’ I murmured, feeling stupidly needy as I spoke.

  Turning to me Nathan’s blue gaze stuck on mine intently and I watched enthralled as he blinked several times, ‘You do stress me out,’ he agreed in a low tone. ‘And before you ask, yes, I do use my countdowns more often since I met you.’ Oh God, he’d just confirmed my fears – I was bad for him. My stomach plummeted as a sickening sensation settled in my chest, but his gaze was holding me captive and no matter how much I wanted to drop my eyes, I found that I couldn’t.

  It felt like we stared at each other in silence for at least ten minutes, but in reality it was probably just a few seconds. The movement of his upper lip tweaking caught my eye and I glanced at his mouth to see it flickering in that way that meant he was supressing a smile. ‘Don’t panic, baby. I’m winding you up. Yes, I stress out over you, but not because of you. I worry on a daily basis about your safety, your happiness, and your health, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.’ Clearing his throat Nathan suddenly looked embarrassed, not an expression I’d seen from him very often. ‘You’ve enlightened my life, Stella. Given me purpose. I’ll take all the stress in the world if it means I get to keep you by my side.’ Crikey. I was utterly gobsmacked. What a declaration. He might not have ever said the ‘L’ word to me out loud, but if that wasn’t a statement of love I didn’t know what was. Licking my lips I watched as Nathan raised a hand and scratched self-consciously at the back of his neck.

  His sudden outpouring of emotion was so uncharacteristic that I barely knew how to respond. Not wanting to ruin the moment by attempting to compete somehow, or respond by listing everything I loved about him, I simply leant forwards in my seat and placed my lips softly against his. ‘I love you, Nathan,’ I murmured against his lips, causing a contented humming noise to rise up his throat as his hand found my hair and slipped through the long strands, pulling me closer to his exploring tongue.

  Heat shot through me from his contact, but then before we’d barely even got started Nathan broke the kiss and leant his forehead on mine, still looking a little sheepish and apparently embarrassed by his outpouring, so I tried to lighten the mood. ‘In addition to worrying you, I’m pretty sure I also piss you off sometimes,’ I murmured through a smile as I leant back in my seat.

  Raising an eyebrow Nathan pressed a button to lower the partition. ‘Yes,’ he agreed sagely, ‘sometimes you do.’ Then turning to speak to Ryan Nathan asked him to bypass my house after getting the sandwiches before he sat back in his seat. ‘Like your stubbornness about moving in with me,’ he stated in a mock accusatory tone as he raised the privacy screen and once again isolated us in our own little bubble.

  ‘I explained my reasons,’ I murmured, but then thinking that my words might sound like a threat about his apartment I quickly added, ‘I’m sure I’ll get used to your place in time.’ I wasn’t sure of that at all – it had already been over a year and I still disliked it, and to be honest I think I’ll always associate it with his previous lifestyle, but if it calmed the moment for now then I was happy to tell a small untruth.

  Sensing the tension leave his frame as Nathan sat back I intrinsically found myself relaxing too. Puffing out the last of my anxiousness I lowered my gaze to fiddle with the seatbelt as I realised that I hadn’t belted myself in. I wasn’t focussing on Nathan, but paused in my task when he spoke again, this time in a far lower tone that echoed around the interior of the car and once again made the air seem thick, but this time with sexual tension.

  ‘Don’t bother with the belt, Stella.’ Flicking my eyes up I watched with rapt attention as Nathan slid across the car so he was sat on the bench seat opposite me. Running a hand down his suit he smoothed the flawless material before raising his dark eyes to mine, spreading his legs and adjusting himself so that his erection visibly tented his trousers. My throat suddenly felt as parched as the Sahara desert. Blimey, where had that come from? Had pissing him off caused that reaction? Because that was certainly an impressive bulge I could spy – not to mention the dark, lusty expression on his face which made the overall look quite a tempting package.

  ‘Come here.’ Two words and a heated gaze was all it took to get me completely fired up. Just those few syllables uttered in his low, domineering tone had my heart racing, cheeks flushing, and my knickers soaked – the way my body reacted so instantaneously to this man would never cease to amaze me. Letting out a slow breath I tried to calm my hammering heart and rationally consider the sensibility of his intentions.

  ‘Here?’ I whispered, simultaneously shocked and hugely aroused by the idea of doing it in Nathan’s company car. Still, surely it was only normal to be shocked when someone proposes car sex? ‘But … but I thought you said you had calls to make?’ I stuttered stupidly. Watching my reaction I saw Nathan’s face alter as a frustrated expression clouded his eyes, making his lustful look fall away as he let out a sigh. ‘I do,’ he said, pulling out his phone and dialling a number without so much as giving me another glance.

  Disappointment crashed over me as I slipped back in my seat and cursed myself. What the hell was I thinking distracting him? I should have kept my stupid mouth shut and just let him continue with his illicit sexual plans. Digging my fingernails into my palms I tried to distract my body from its huge excitement but it was no good, my groin hummed with unspent arousal and as I inwardly chastised myself I tried to get comfortable by parting my legs to ease the pressure of the throbbing.

  In my bag my phone began to ring and I huffed out a grumbly breath of irritation. In my highly strung state I didn’t particularly feel like talking to anyone, but seeing as Nathan was making calls I may as well answer it – and on the positive side at least it might distract me. Digging around in my bag I retrieved my phone and pulled it out only to see Nathan’s number flashing on screen. Looking across to him in confusion I was met with a completely blank expression; he merely raised his eyebrows and jerked his chin towards my phone to indicate I should answer it.

  Confused but still hugely turned on I didn’t even bother to argue the stupidity of the situation. Instead I pressed the accept button and lifted my phone to my ear whilst looking him directly in the eyes. ‘I said, come over here, Stella,’ he stated darkly, his eyes flashing with the challenge I had accidentally presented. ‘Don’t make me ask you again.’ Nathan clicked off his phone with a flick of his wrist, slipped it back in his jacket pocket, and sat back expectantly with his hands resting on his spread thighs, all the while burning holes in me with his heated stare.

  The car suddenly felt very warm. Really, really frigging warm, and I instinctively ran a finger around the collar of my shirt to loosen it even though it wasn’t particularly tight. Gulping in some air I swallowed, sat up straighter, and attempted to mimic some of his calm disposition with a flippant comment – ‘No seat belts, Mr Jackson, that’s a little dangerous isn’t it?’ – but my pretend composure was ruined when I fumbled my bag and ended up dropping my phone on the floor of the car. Bending to pick it up with a curse I suddenly found myself being gripped around the waist and hoisted up so I was splayed facedown across Nathan’s lap where he landed two short, hard spanks on my upturned bottom. A yelp of surprise escaped me, both from my sudden position and the slight sting in my bum, but there was no time for more thoughts or words because he then manhandled me upright so I was sat astride his lap facing him with my mouth just inches from his. ‘Watch that sarcasm, Miss Marsden,’ he murmured, his blue eyes twinkling with obvious excitement. Then, with a growling sound emanating low in his throat, Nathan’s lips found mine before proceeding to almost kiss the life out of me.

  Oh God, as he kissed me his stubble was doing its thing again, scratching against my soft chin and turning me on beyond all belief. A few moments later Nathan lifted his mouth and left m
e feeling dazed, overheated, and decidedly needy. Looking down at my undoubtedly flushed face he gave me one of his trademark sexy, sly smiles while somehow still managing to look calm and sure of himself. ‘Concerned about not being locked in, are you? It’s just as well I went shopping a few weeks ago then. I got something especially for you,’ he added cryptically, shifting me off his lap and then opening a small compartment in the middle of the seat.

  Taking a second to collect myself I smoothed my hair and made a vague attempt to see the contents of the compartment, but was in too much of an aroused and fidgety state to do so subtly, and failed when Nathan blocked my view with a low chuckle. Drawing out the suspense he paused, his hand hovering above the small cupboard, as he turned to me with a wicked glimmer in his blue eyes. Closing the lid without removing anything from inside, he lowered his hand to his flawless suit and slowly popped the button open before leaning forwards and slipping off his jacket. My gaze was locked on his every move. Even with his shirt still on his toned chest was obvious as it caused the material to stretch across the flat planes of his pecs. Calmly folding up the expensive material Nathan placed in on the opposite seat and then began to unbutton and roll up his shirt sleeves into neatly folded chunks just below his elbows.

  ‘Kneel on the seat facing the headrest,’ he suddenly instructed me briskly while he continued to arrange his left sleeve to his perfect satisfaction.

  I was about to argue, but he obviously saw my hesitation and shook his head slowly, his eyes darkening to a dangerous blue-black hue that silenced me immediately. Swallowing loudly I stared at him in rapt fascination as I recognised the look growing on his face as a sign of his Dominant self making an appearance. ‘Usually I like your challenges, you know that, Stella, but we don’t have time today to play your ‘ I’ll do it in the end, but I’ll argue first’ games. Now, do as I say.’